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October 27th, 2006

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August 13th, 2006

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July 30th, 2006

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May 4th, 2006

10:09 pm okay so i heard what sounded like fall out boy this pary "we are only liars but we're the best..." and then a lown singing hum of something... and then jay telling us that she loved us.... NAT i am so sorry i could not make it to walmart...i was at sonic and tried..... but it did not work out... :( but your sister is having a grand time... she really needed this break. i am happy for her. ~~kris~~ i now want to go to a FOB concert... I AM MAD JEALOUS. haha Current Location: home Current Mood: sad Current Music: FOB

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April 30th, 2006

09:54 pm - this is for you my friends...whom i love very very much..lord. its a ghost town baby, and we are driving crazy/when you relie on all your friends. i have seen people sucked in, there is no way to stop them, from becoming walking dead. You're still living but barely breathing. Get out while you can, Just drive away cause no one here will save you, drive away and dont look back. You're gone. Its a ghost town sister, i have seen your dreams wither, and thats what giving me the creeps. Spent your whole life waiting, in a town thats fadeing, its a never ending sleep. You're still breathing barely breathing get out while you can, Just drive away cause no one here will save you, drive away and don't look back. just drive away cause nothing here will change you, drive away and don't look back. You will be so alone here, and drink all alone here, nobody feels like we feel like we do, we are all alone here, we will die all alone here, no one and nobody feels like we do, like we do. Just drive away cause no one here will save you, drive away and don't look back. just drive away cause no one here will save you, drive away and don't look back. just drive away cause nothing here will change you, drive away and don't look back. you're still living barely breathing get out while you can. phew.... haha. man....to know that both of you will most likely be out of state for a while... in a way i am still sad but still excited for you guys. agh... so i went to a catholic church today and yeah i had not been to church in years. It was definately diff. and in a way i liked it... I went to Solita's confermation. And it was alyssa's also...i saw here there but we didn't talk...and nat did not talk to me either.... but he did call afterwards...and let me know things were still cool, and i let him know that he should hang out with his friends more, and he let me know that our friends are always going out of town (which is true) and that we were still in school. and i was OH!! haha... AND YEAH i talked to my father last night and it was not good...at all.... he will no co-sign for me to get an apartment and wants me to move off to some university. i just do not know....ASLDKFJ;ALSKDJF;LAKSJDF;LASKJDF i am done. ~~kris~~ Current Mood: aggravated Current Music: a band i do not know...haah but they are really good

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April 19th, 2006

06:59 pm - What do you do when two of your closest friends are taken away by the ways of life? do not worry i am missing you. so so much. by the way....i finally got that new job...but i am kind of regreting it...you are leaving in a matter of days...and i just wish i could see you forever and ever... maybe this get away is the best thing for you and i truly hope it is.... though i am going to miss you so fucking much. you better call me when you get there and while you are at the show... find a way damnit. haha i love you so so much lady. ~~kris~~ things will be fine in a matter of time. i just do not want you to see the tears streaming down my face. sometimes ya'll are all i have got. i think its time to move on for all of us.....?!?! :( :( :( bagh.....no more awesome starbucks moments.... i hate it i hate it i hate it but i love it. you get a chance to live, to do things on your own. all i can do is wish you guys the best of luck hugs and kisses from all around, and a robot charge. road trips, crazy mexicans, to cig breaks at albertsons. gosh. i can't. ~~kris~~ Current Location: mi casa Current Mood: sad Current Music: Law &Order:Svu

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April 8th, 2006

01:22 pm - MY LOVELY LADIES!!!! IOU 15 dollars....... and my car is dying again. haha but maybe i can make it....ya know... WE SHOULD GO WATCH THE FIREWORKS TONIGHT AT THE PARK!!!!!!! and play a board game or something....while at the park... haha i miss you girls like soo much. ummmm...life is running on empty so i am not sure if we could keep it going.....its sad how money makes this world go fucking round. ~~kris~~ robots tonight for sure....if i can makes it. WATCH OUT HOES!!! b/c....i heard you call yourselves hunters.and.....i will not be the bait. Current Mood: happy

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March 30th, 2006

08:33 pm - Some will seek forgiveness, Others Escape. YAY!!! well i finaaly got some information!!! I miss my lovely sooo so so much....but hey....i am still living...when i go on my cruise i will have to wait just as long until i get to see him. So hey....i am good. Just because i know i should talk to him on Monday, b/c John said so!! YAYAYAYA best news all week. The girls always bring good news. If it was not for Jay stalking his phone then i would have never known. I have decided that i need more friends on this thing...like hxc. so yeah add me por favor...and somehow let me know that you did...haha i needs more people. Not saying that the twins are boreing me or anything....it would be nice to have some feed back sometimes right?? haha gosh....even though things feel horrid...i know they are okay. so i met a pervert today....do i need to watch my back every time i walk up your walk way....haha and watch the windows?? ROBOTS....my god....i need to charge someone. my ro's battery has died and needs recharging. teehee... sssssshhhh!!!! ~~kris~~ Current Mood: blah Current Music: Saturday- FALL OUT BOY!!!!

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March 26th, 2006

10:16 pm - I was told to fuck off by my boyfriends mother. My wonderful love story has turned into the horrors of Romeo and Juliet. Must we die to be able to be happy?.....we would live and burn in hell....b/c apparently we are the worst walking on the face of this planet. Ha. I remember when we first began....your mother telling me how wonderful she thought we were....and then i was childish for not wanting to use birth control and that i cried over my car, and then we were good again.....oh and now i am killing you with my smoke......i do not put a gun to your head and tell you to light up. I started to write a letter to her last night....but towards the end i forgot what i was saying sorry for......i did not sign it b/c it would not have been good enough. "then just fuck off" what a way to tie the peices together.....Ro....what if this was the end of it all? B/c right now it just seems that all i am doing is fucking up your life.....I used to pray to god that your mother would not get sick anymore and i would pray over and over for her to be healthy.....it feels as if was a waste of time. I loved her soo much and stuck up for her when you told me you were mad at her.....but then.....groundings b/c of pillow cases??? I seriously believe that this isn't about you anymore....its me. My mother is right.....she is probably pissed off at me for saying the things i do sometimes....well hell.....i am mad...i will say what is true.... god. Ro. I know she is going to read this...and won't tell you...but. I love you.....if this is the end.....god i hope you can be happy. Move to your dads.....be happy....I am tired of seeing a frown on your face.....of seeing you cry. but then again....i don't want you to get in trouble down there.....or get caught in a fight.....FUCK...WHAT?!?!? IS THE BEST FOR YOU???? you are stuck at the fork in the road.....and to me i am not in either of those pictures....i will develope my camera...and mail you a picture... We have both hit rock botom.....i can see you sitting in your room....trying to play your guitar....but i see you lying down instead.... I am glad that she has made it clear that she doesn't like me.........a question i no longer have to ponder over....from the day i met you.....i know we would always be together....just as friends or as lovers....from the day i met you i seemed to have always kept your spirits up....i made you smile when you cried...i soothed your anger when you were mad. I think it is funny how blind i was from the start.....how everyone told us we would be married...haha..... Rosendo...my answer to your statement/question everytime we say bye...is YES...YES YES.... lets press fast forward.....and then rewind.....i just want to know how it would be..... I am sorry Diana for loving your son so entirly much.... i never broke the promise of letting him smoke.....i never handed him another one after that.....he had to get if from someone else.... I do believe in the lord....just not in the functions of getting there....he shows me shit in mysterious ways....well....the way my lungs have been hurting and chokeing.....it is about time.....its not for her....it would be for me....i just keep on trucking in spite of her now....i don't want her to think that i listen to every word she says.....i am feeling rebelious.... i am me...and that is why you love me. I love you....i shall go now for days with no end of not sleeping....and barely eating....I am sorry....its just the way it goes when you are this low.... and oh yeah. don't feel sorry for me if you read this....and no i am not lashing out towards her.....i am just putting my words on paper..... I have come to realize that i will never see her face again.....i don't think i want to.... Ro's birthday bar-b-que.....very quiet i knew something was up. Ro.....you are not the problem anymore....its me....and i am sure its b/c i love you. and that i want to be with you every moment....a whole year...i will have to wait for us to be as happy as we could ever be.....i love you.... wow...how things could change.... ~~kris~~ its like a restraining order...on me Current Mood: crushed

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March 23rd, 2006

10:56 pm - my world is full of bright colors. guys....he is my one and only.... i could never ever....ever be with out him. We are starting to have our little "you are pissing me off at the moments" but hey they never turn bad. we both know when....shit he/she has had enough....let them cool down kiss them laters. i love it i love him.....i love love love everything about him. His Crazy ass fucking home town. HIS DAD IS AMAZING.....completely opposite of what your mother has told me....completely opp. Yeah Yeah, i know he wasn't there for you when you were born. I KNOW how it feels to not have your father around.....to not be there for you when you scrape your knee...i know how it feels...i really do. but you know what . i love my dad....i know he loves me. I know your father loves you....this is what he told me. "rosendo is my baby. he is still learning, i love him. he is all that i have got. he is my son my child. my everything. please treat him right" that is what he told me. I wanted to cry...Baby i am not all that you have got. Your dad will be there for you....throught the thick and the thin. and so will i....YOU ARE MY ONE AND ONLY. you are amazing. i just can't get enought of you. i want more. haha scary right? anyways. life is grand as you can tell, I am on my way to be a Vet Tech....living life. YUM i want to eat it all up. haha Corpus was fun...bright green lights....."nice fireworks...fuck face." Robstown is the place to be. i advise that you visit....for a day or two....it only takes two days....to get the full effect.but i love it. CAT FOOD IS THE GATEWAY TO LOVE.... phone calls with no one on the other line....is horrid. BAGH..... i love the girls...they are the cooolest......haha sunburns to die for. haha busting ass with skim boards....haa it is fun to watch the first timers.... i was sitting there knowing all the tricks and not telling anyone...because (haha i just got a phone call from some random person....telling me they were bringing money tomarrow for some STUFF....haaha but that they had no clue who they were going to talk to for it.....WHAT AM I A DRUG DEALER NOW?!?!?! HAHA ANYWAYS) SERIOUSLY....watching my lovely fall on his ass was really entertaining.....i tried to tell him how to keep from falling...but no....he finally figured it out though...i got bored we left. haha AND...my car was attacked by telephone lines...haha crazy mexicans. Acuras........god i hate that kid.....he was psycho and almost had me killed. TIMMMY!!!! that kid is grand.....so so grand. funny as hell and has this super awesome phone that is fucking broken.....haha i was listening to a recorded fight....off of his phone.... the time that kid has......god. no seriously he is funny as shit and is afraid of ghosts. haah well all in all life is good....i shall go lay down and wait for my one and only to call me.... a promise i shall keep. peace love and crabs everybody. ~~kris~~ Current Mood: happy

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February 12th, 2006

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December 3rd, 2005

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November 27th, 2005

10:53 pm - HAPPY BIRTHDAY LADIES!!!!!! i didn't call and i know it. i am super sorry. but this right here is just for you gals! the big 2 2 yep yep....getting older!!! you make think that is just another year to have everything fuck up in your lives...but no. It will all pan out you just have to give it some time and have some faith. I love you girls sooo much and if i didn't think things would be better...i would help yall out as much as i could. but it will i promise you this. I know yall didn't want to celebrate...and i really wanted to throw a party for yall but yall seriously did not want one....so i gave up!!! BAGH!!! I hope yalls birthday "day" was an alright day... but yeah... i am going to hit the sack... love yall lots! ~~kris~~ Current Mood: crazy

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November 24th, 2005

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November 21st, 2005

10:16 pm - when life gives me lemons...i make beef stew. i just had a oober long talk with my mother... and i am afraid she is right. i am sorry.. i have left all my reasons behind...and listened to hers.. im sorry. ~~kris~~ Current Mood: crappy Current Music: scary music off Nip Tuck.

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November 16th, 2005

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November 14th, 2005

10:34 pm - its almost over. so about 20 min. ago...i filled out my graduation packet information.... thank you cards and the whole you are invited cards... bagh!!!! it is almost over. I think i have decided to take a year off though...and try things on my own. My Mom is moving to Cali without me....and is going to live on the beach with her fiance....whos deadly rich. Navy. that is his excuse. (((!!!!ro just called and asked me if i could pick his ass up at 4 in the fucking morning!!!!)))i said yes... but yeah...so everyone is moving to Cali. I am going to wait a year before i go off to college...where ever the hell i go. I had like this whole life plan since i was a little girl...and now it has gone to shit.... I am soo different than everyone else yet im and just the same...everything falls apart right in front of my eyes. i thought i would be the one to withstand it all...being such the hardheaded little shit that i am...i though i could take it on. but no...i don't even want to leave i dont want to grow up...i still want to be that little girl that runs to her closet when she wants to cry...the one that hides her tears so she could be strong for others. The one that still has to pick up her room b/c her momma told her so. I still want to be a child...i don't feel as if i haven't done it all. but im going to try it....taking a year off. i might stay in Kerrville for a little while...while my friends grad...and yeah maybe i will go to just a little college and not some high dollar university like my father wishes. I love Auburn though...i could get back on the team...and be a gymnast again...and not have my body cramps anymore...I could work at a clinic there...and bust out my vet tech hours. I hate making decisions. If i stay in town...i need a room mate... girls...don't move...we can live together...with the money you two make...yall can buy an okay car...wanna honda like mine?? i can hook you up...wanna a newer car but no payments....i can hook you up...i really can. but if it really is best that yall move away...then do it. as long as you guys are happy. I am almost out...i am about to be kicked into a world that i hope i will be ready for.....*crosses fingers* awww.... so i hear that my number will be given away tomarrow... haha... cute. Just know...that i ummmm....am very...cautious now. its not all entirly my fault... i tried so hard to not close myself to others....but it just happens... Friday Night? well...I have to work 5-9....at my other job. sucks...i know. im sorry. but yeah...i just assume that you have read my entry's...well the ones i wrote about you...haha. so i don't really know what to say except that i am glad that you like my hair.haha and that...i don't think you would go to jail.... i um....kind of know....every cop in this town.... they are all very good friends of the family... so you can just guess what my mom has to say about this situation...she kind of read over my shoulder... haha and wants to know why to you went to jail... oh yeah so do i.. haha she doesn't approve...but she know that i don't give what she thinks... p.s. dont take forever to update. ~~kris~~ .drove me nuts. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: Fall Out Boy-Saturday

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November 13th, 2005

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November 9th, 2005

10:30 pm - hmmm? so my last entry i made it friends only....i think i should change it.... but not right now...maybe now is not the right time... ** and its odd how you mix the two and it starts just when life makes sense to feel the love you can not miss.and it burns a hole through everyone who feels it.well you're never gunna find it if you're lookin for it.won't come your way. should have done something but i've done it enough, by the way your hands were shaking rather waste some time with you. and you never would have thought in the end how amazing it feels just to live again, to feel a love you can not miss it burns a hole through everyone who feels it. should have done something but i've done it enough, by the way your hands were shaking rather waste some time with you. should have said something but i've said it enough, by the way my words were fadeing, rather waste my time with you. ** haha...i don't know. that really is a good song. so are all the rest of the songs on this cd. i don't know what is up with me tonight....well not even just tonight... have you ever had those times where you know you have to get up and get on top of things...and set things straight...but you just don't do it? well that is me right now. i have all these tests to take....just to get into the school i want...but i won't do it....i know i can keep my grades up..i just don't do it. but i still try. ** knowing nothing is better than knowing at all ** Ro....hes like really down right now....and i have been in his shoes...and i know that to get back with the person...just b/c yall are talking again might help...but it doesn't... he doesn't realize that. but i know that anything that someone might tell you to help you feel better.... really and truly it goes through one ear and out the other... when you are that low nothing else matters... all you try to do is try to find that one thing that would make you feel better...and that is what in the end...turned around and hurt you i cry for him...i love him. i dont know how i am going to manage leaving him when i go off to school my one and only brother... well not my only borther....just one that i confide in " YOU ARE MY SISTER...HOW CAN YOU THINK THAT KRISTIAN!!! you know me better than anyone...." "ro....im sorry...." that is what happened at work today... i seriously almost started to cry right there in the middle of everything... pushing my red buttons on the screen...customers yelling at me... and trying to help ro. and saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. ** is it worth it can you even hear me. ** oh. this weekend should be intresting... i hope that it all ties together. (hmmm) a movie night... i am guessing its going to be me jay nat and zach...also this other awesome person... r ra Ray ay y lol that was fun anyways...hes this super cool *replace the word kid with something else* (ha) that works at albertsons.. in produce with Ro. Ro thinks he is super. mee too he cracks me up... he once told me that i could get more than 20% of the male pop. in Kerrville arrested... i had no comment. lol i still dont i have many questions.... that i really do want answered. i just don't know how to ask with out truly knowing what is going on. bagh. so yeah I saw chuck today. haha i love how we ignore eachother.... not even friends...but all the hatred and saddness is leaving me....like today...i didn't want to run him over or something...when i saw him i saw a time before it all play again in my mind...and i laughed the time when he was driving and i randomly stuck my foot on the gas and scared the shit out of him.... haha it really was funny b/c we barely knew eachother and he thought i was trying to kill us both. haha i miss old friendships like that...fun ones... ruben is really the only friend i have after a hard break up... by the way... ruben left a voice mail with a song that made me feel okay... the whole "i know were cool" by Gwen... if i answered the phone that would have been the first time in a while i would have talke to him outside of lunch. haha i was emotional today... its okay though everyone has those days right? or am i like insane... no. lol i love my life actually...if i could just get my act together and get my shit straight. i will adventually. okay so i think i have waited long enough for one of the twins to get on.... i am oober tired now. IM awaiting this awesome weekend. bagh.... *crosses fingers* im out ~~kris~~ Current Mood: anxious Current Music: The Used

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